April 1, 2022

Captain Alan and the Galactic Pirate Plank

Captain Alan and the Galactic Pirate Plank

Captain Alan and the Galactic Pirate Plank

Alan never thought he’d be a pirate. Especially not a space pirate aboard a ship shaped like a giant banana. But here he was, wearing a crooked pirate hat, standing next to his best pal, Ted the turtle, and steering a ship through cosmic jellyfish.  

“Alan,” said Ted, “why do I always get stuff stuck in my shell? Look at this! A cornflake! I haven't had cereal in months.”  

Alan laughed, his hat wobbling on his head. “Don’t blame me; maybe space cereal is sneaky!”  

Before Ted could reply, their magical pet and ship mechanic, Ben the Beaver, popped out of a trapdoor wearing goggles way too big for his little face. “Ahoy, Captain Alan!” he called, standing at attention.  

“Ben, you don’t have to say ‘Ahoy’ every time,” Alan giggled.  

“But we’re pirates!” Ben squeaked proudly. “Space pirates!” He held up a blueprint smeared with peanut butter. “I’ve got a super-genius plan to turbo-charge our ship so we can outrun Captain Tumblemac!”  

Captain Tumblemac was a grumpy, goldfish-obsessed space pirate who had sworn to steal Alan’s treasure map: a parchment that smelled suspiciously like cheese and led to the legendary Moonberry Island.  

“Fine, turbo-charge away!” Alan said.  

But before Ben could start, the ship suddenly jolted. “Blastin' barnacles, what’s that?” yelled Ted, spinning so fast his hat flew off.

Outside the porthole, a giant space kraken with rainbow-colored tentacles was tapping on the ship. It wasn’t attacking – it looked curious.  

Alan grabbed a banana-shaped telescope and peered out. “Ahoy there, slimy stranger! How can we help you?”  

The kraken tapped twice, then held up a sign made of floating asteroids. It read: **“YOU DROPPED THIS.”**  

The kraken’s tentacle held up a golden sandwich Alan had accidentally left on a comet during Tuesday’s treasure hunt. “Why, thank you!” said Alan cheerfully.  

The rainbow kraken returned the sandwich, giving it an amused “blorp” before drifting off into the sparkly void.  

“No time for snacking!” said Ben. “Look!”  

Coming up behind them was Captain Tumblemac’s colossal ship, *The Salty Koi*. Its sails were made of old socks, and it smelled like fish sticks from a thousand galaxies away.  

“Give me yer map, or I’ll make you walk the… uh… space plank!” roared Tumblemac over a megaspeaker.  

Alan grinned. “Walk the plank? In zero gravity? How?”  

Tumblemac scratched his head. “Well… er… with magnets!”  

Just then, Ben flipped a switch. The turbo engine roared, and the banana ship blasted forward, leaving *The Salty Koi* wobbling in its banana-scented space dust.  

“Huzzah!” cheered Alan, Ted, and Ben.  

As the ship zoomed toward Moonberry Island, Alan took a big bite of his golden sandwich. “Space adventures are the best,” he said, with peanut butter on his nose.